What a day.
Wake up, 5am, as per usual. On the bus at 6:15, at school by 6:25. Organize my lessons for the day, go outside for gate duty from 7:00-7:20. My first class arrives by 7:30, and they do their warm-up. These French 1s enjoy talking, and talking they do a lot. To the point where they can't even sit still in my class. They don't listen to each other, they don't listen to me. So I had to be stern with them today, and explain the consequences of constantly talking and not paying attention to each other or to me, which is losing their participation marks of 15% of their final grade. This is huge. I explained that if they have a 94% in their class, and lose 15% on participation, what does that leave? (79%). And what grade is that? (C+). And I would not be boosting a C+ on account of behaviour in my class. I had had enough.
The girls were silent at this point. Absolutely silent.
And they tried arguing. And they tried being smart with me. And I tried explaining it.
I gave them their assignment, and let them to work. I had no urge to try and get them to participate in large group activities if they just were going to be that way. I wanted, for one, to see that the girls could figure it out on their own - to combat their "learned helplessness" and give them pride in their achievements. And they complained throughout the entire activity! Until the end, when they realized that they had done it, and had done it in no time at all.
I had girls writing on the board, "Je deteste le francais" (at least they learned something!) - these are my very outgoing girls, the ones who are constantly complaining that I take their marks off while talking during the lesson.
So out of 17 students, the only 7 or so who do not hate me at this moment are the few who never get to talk during class, who want to learn desperately but cannot because of the ones who crave my attention and slow down the class - these 7 girls got to answer questions at the end of class - I got to hear their voices for once - because the rest of the class refused to participate.
But it was silent.
And yet I feel bad. I don't like that I had to be stern with them, I don't like that they claimed I was mean and hated them (which I denied - vehemently), I don't like that I don't know what to do at this point. And I don't like that this will inhibit my sleeping for the next few days.
I need to find a job that doesn't require so much invested emotional and physical energy.
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Oh, one more thing. Our first teacher flew the coop yesterday - just up and left the country, no explanation, just that she was "done". The sad thing is that at this point, everyone is feeling a little "done" and running seems very tempting - the honeymoon period is over, Ramadan is over - the girls are giving us a run for our money and making us earn every last penny. There's only 20 more teaching days until Christmas, which is coming none-too-soon.
I have to admit that I'm a little homesick at times, especially when it's tough, but I'm having more fun in Kuwait and experiencing more than I would be in nowheresville Ontario. Thank God for good friends, good fun and good shoulders to lean and cry on.
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7 comments:
Remember Mr. Mack? He had to be stern with us and everyone thought he hated them. So remember you are not alone in this and that you were once in your student's shoes.
h,Katie. This, too, is a learning experience. Not only for your girls, but for you too.
There is good in every situation. The loud ones are silent for a change, so the quiet ones can speak. Once the quiet ones realize their opinion is worthy - they may speak up more, and the 'loud' ones will realize they have to share the spotlight.
And remember the times when you thought your mom was "mean" and "didn't love you" (even though she did every moment!) Sometimes you have to be the grownup. Like now.
Looking forward to seeing you at Christmas - and we're counting the days too.
Love (every moment!!!) -- Mom & Dad.
PS - And if those girls ever need therapy - you're paying for it!
heehee.
Love, Mom.
i just wish that i could explain it to the girls so that they would understand my side of it....but they won't listen.
it's hard to try and explain the "big picture" to a bunch of overly sensitive girls - i myself never liked to be disciplined...and they don't want to hear any of it. they just think i'm mean. and i didn't even yell. i was just very serious.
Katie,
keep your head up high...you are surely doing a good job!!
Every job has their challenging days...and bad parts to it. I get to look at colons all day...how sh..y is that? haha!! but in the end of the day, I know I am there for a good reason.
It was a good chance for the quiet ones to speak up, maybe they will feel more confident now for the next time.
Looking forward to seeing you and hearing more at Christmas...it is almost December!! yikes!!
take care, we will remember to pray for you.
Pam
Why is it 3 am there? I'd like to talk to you!!! Thinking of you and going through much of the same pain....
Teaching is indeed a hard job. Especially in Kuwait; some of the kids can be very difficult. And stubborn. And obnoxious. You just have to keep standing strong and keep speaking your views until you get your point across. They don't want to listen? Bull. MAKE them listen. You are the teacher. You make the decisions. You are in charge. You have to be stern sometimes, yes. But, honestly, when dealing with kids like these, there is no other way. If you're nice, they'll only take advantage. Trust me. I'm not saying they're all bad, just the select few that give you a hard time. Better yet, tell them how they make you feel when they act the way they do. Don't feel bad; stay strong. It'll be okay.
:)
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